i hate her

blamed for a crime that never happened, hated because i deceived someone, but deceive because that someone believes i deceived, and pained because i want to show her that it is not me..... 3 months..... 3 months have flied since i was incriminated by few unfounded statements but yet uncomfortable, yet to be calmed, yet the storm is going in this heart.... how can i bear blames like this for so long when, i bet, u cannt live a single day with rest if accused for something unreal, smthing that u never did.

in the first month, I hided the truths coz they beared a possiblity of bringing more misunderstandings and during this period i was never taken for trust for a second probably. She started talking to me, for she forgave me ..... :) forgave me for what.... for what for the crime that she fabricated, for the blame that she enjoyed pouring upon me. After that having fed up of this, I told her the truth and as I had thought, it brought nothing but havoc..... and from now on... she enjoyed having disbelief upon me..... and would say, kabhi tu ye bolta hai, kabhi tu wo bolta hai .. i am nt able to trust..... ok fine .... for almost one month, i told her the truth and she was never believing on it and subsequently I was awarded for a "story-fabrication-award". After that seeing no improvement in relations, I said lies to her... and what was remained after that.... disbelieves.... not a penny of trust.... and ashes of a burned relation..... for the goodness sake, I tried for 3 months to make her believe that i m nt that person, only and solely because I thought we shared a good relation and it was only because of some misunderstandings bt now... given up... I dont want to look at her face, and y would I, when she doesnt care? but once, once in a lifetime, i want to show her that it was not me. there is really no place for her in my heart now except purgatory, bt the day i will show my cleanness, i will remove her from there also.... hoped u could have sm idea of how painful it is... bt nw i dont wish for it